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Client: A client of a professional person or organisation is a person or company that receives a service from them in return for payment.

I started studying counselling in 2017. From the outset, I have pondered the noun client to describe a person who seeks or engages in counselling. In student practice, we talk about the speaker and the listener.

I have continued using the word speaker after qualifying and asking people to pay to work together. The definition of the client does describe the service I am offering, but it feels slightly strange. Even though the term client trips…

How important is the counsellors virtual background during online therapy?

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In the essay, The Clinic Offers No Advantage over the Screen, for Relationship is Everything (2020) the clinical psychologist Gily Agar discusses the benefits of online therapy. The research on the effectiveness of online therapy found it to be as successful as in-person therapy. It Provided a space that constitutes a place of growth which may take longer than in a physical counselling room.

As Agar discusses the benefits and drawbacks of online therapy I can reflect on my own recent experience. Practical examples Such as a bad connection or seeing the white cat hair on my dark shirt just…

I was channeling Leslie Jones and her appearance on the last season of RuPaul’s Drag Race all through those US election results.

What a long week for anyone avidly following the American elections. I know for myself it was only a few hours sleep UK time on Tuesday night and Wednesday morning. I was hooked on the results coming in, waiting for refreshed news and updated ballots. I actually kept my cat from sleeping as I had to get up hourly to recharge my phone. …

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Are you going back to work in that office after weeks of home working? Why are you?

A month ago I started working from home. I have a waged job and working on studying to qualify as a Cognitive Behavioural Therapist (CBT). That course involved placement practice hours. Life was so busy and I only felt in downtime energy to avoid doing actual study until the deadline was starting at me from the week calendar. It didn’t quite because I had to check in with a colleague when deadlines with each deadline a shocking surprise.

I know we are in a World Wide Health Crisis and to have a job, and the ability to work from home…

Buying an item from a big coffee shop chain can be wrought with ethical dilemma

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I have been quite loyal to Starbucks. The global market for the coffee shop lifestyle has been pursued by Starbucks with one seemingly on every 2nd city street corner since I first noticed them in the early 2000s. They are familiar and for my tastebuds have a nice coffee, filtered or otherwise. The filtered coffee is a reasonable price in comparison to others. The UK price extends my loyalty app top-up to go further to reach 15 stars before the reward of a free coffee…

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A few Saturday nights ago I sat through a binge of a lifestyle blogger on YouTube. This YouTuber focuses on unboxing an item, house tours and general flotsam of his life. Watching it is an act of ASMR (Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response). The question I ask myself is why I am so fascinated with the seemingly ordinary of day to day living?

To provide one answer, I have always been interested in ‘fly-on-the-wall’ TV documentary or the direct cinema of Albert and David Maysles. Observing someone else’s life could be a past time for me, a reason that most of…

There have been a couple of anniversaries/life events which have brought me to reflect on the importance ofChannel 4 to a young, burgeoning ‘homosexual’ like me in the mid 1980s.

I am from a generation that found the UK Channel 4 of the 1980s a channel of liberation and wish that we still had something similar. In today’s media the story is of the self with you the story rather your story through a different lens.

As a creation, Channel 4 aimed to bring marginalised voices to TV viewers. Initially never intended to be a mainstream channel it’s creation and content upset parliamentarians with content, both explicitly and implicitly, portraying different gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender lives and experiences in 1980s Britain and beyond. …

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I was awake at 5:15am this morning. The cat was jumping around, scratching at my bedside table then running away when I attempted to stop or placate her; an alternative cat and mouse game where I am the cat and she is the mouse.

She wouldn’t let me settle, but am I transferring my restlessness onto her?Inside it was me who was finding it difficult to relax in the post-Christmas slobber. I knew I had an important thing to do, so in the unusual mildness of a late-December morning I rose to start a task.

The task was to research…

Like every drag performance you hope there is a glimmer of excellence from the UK’s Prime Minister but who is making the threatening comments in secret?

Recently a comment to a YouTube post of the late Opera Singer Montserrat Caballé singing O Mio Babbino Caro. It focused on her control and style and was quite technical until the last sentence:

Yas Queen…come thru?!?

It is a truly melancholic performance of the Puccini song and yes, she did come thru’.

If this phrase is about the ‘fierceness’ of her performance, why do I keep replaying it in my mind when I see Theresa May? Why do I want her to come thru, and with what?

Maybe it is because she has not lost her awkwardness but being…


I pay myself to think. Youth Worker and former Gender Studies student now writing on LGBTQ culture, social spaces and gender.

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